Why do I worry about what people think so much?
Why did I hesitate to wear a wig to a wedding? (Because I had seen the guests before hand and I didn’t want to weird them out)
But why do I care if I weird people out? who’s to say that’ll even happen?
If I want to do something why don’t I Just do it?
What is it about other people whom I don’t even know that makes me care about their opinions?
why seek approval from complete strangers?
I guess I’m just afraid of looking like a joke.
But I’m pretty sure no one is going to look at me as a joke. Except for me. Which is twisted.
Why am I my worst enemy?
How do I not love my own skin that I am in?
What happened to the confident elementry school girl who rose her hand for every answer in class even when they were wrong?
That girl got made fun of for having a flat chest once she hit 7th grade.
That girl was told by a fellow classmate that the acne on her face looked like several different worlds and planets on her face.
That girl started staying in the shadows trying hard not to be seen like an abused kid making little to no movement the abuser was around.
So why worry?
So the abuse won’t srart again.